Sexuality is a powerful gift that can open us to the mysteries of love and the spirit of life. This truth is taught by Roxana Hewett, who is devoted to empowering women through tantric education. We’re grateful that she is also helping us kick off our very first SERENE London dinner event, where she will lead us in an intimate conversation on tantra, sexuality and the feminine. There will also be a Q&A session, following the talk, and short meditations and visualizations. In anticipation of this engaging evening and her upcoming Body Love, Body Bliss Retreat in Greece, SERENE got to know this inspirational woman. Below, learn about Roxana’s journey to teaching tantra and how the ancient practice liberates self-love, unity and understanding.

Can you please describe tantra?

Tantra is a path of meditation practices. What’s unique about it is that it includes all aspects of human life. The aim is to reconnect us with our wholeness and with the wholeness of life. As a result every part of human life is embraced as a place where we can gain wisdom by bringing conscious loving awareness. This includes our breath, movement, stillness, emotions, sex, sleep, eating, relating and more.

What guided you to the path of teaching the ancient tradition?

When I first heard about tantra as a path of spirituality that included sexual practices, my jaw dropped. In my Muslim upbringing these two were opposite poles of life. I was intrigued and delighted. I had to learn more as both these aspects of life were important to me.

How does tantra weave together spirituality and sexuality?

Firstly let’s have a broad definition of spirituality as human activity that is aimed at connecting us human beings to the mysterious source of life.

Tantra is over 5,000 years old. The ancients honoured sex as a portal of life. Quite logically when they wondered how to access the source of life, seeing that sexual union brings us here from the great mystery they considered sexual union as a possible path to travel the other way with our awareness.

Most of us have experienced the transcendental aspects of orgasm, expansion of self, profound connection with life, loss of small ego self – time stops, the chatter of our minds disappears, wonder, bliss and joy glow throughout our being. This state is totally akin to what mystics seek in uniting with the cosmos. Some tantric paths studied and explored this possibility.

Why is the practice empowering for women?

Most spiritual paths have been created by men to serve men.

Tantra has roots in prior to the patriarchal era. It is a path that honours life as a union between two equal and opposite complimentary forces, feminine and masculine.

Tantra honours both.

It is concerned with bringing these two forces into union. The practices empower us to achieve union within ourself, union between the sexes and union in the vaster spheres of life.

Women and men are empowered on this path. This tremendous equality is not only what women need but men also. The ecological balance on the planet needs this union. The economic disparities and violence on the planet need this union.

How does tantra allow women to connect with their feminine power and inner goddess?

Accessing feminine power and the Goddess in self and life happens through deep self-acceptance, understanding and opening to the fullness of our being. Many of us as women have been taught to disconnect from our bodies and sexuality. Many women have experienced some form of trauma or violation which further dissociates us from our bodily reality. Tantric practices can serve to bring us back home to ourselves. To release the places where we have contracted from life and to expand again.

Can you share how the ancient discipline is an act of self-love and self-realization?

When we meet a path that welcomes our whole being, something deeply split in us can relax and stop defending, stop rejecting ourselves.

One of the more poetic meanings of the word tantra is to turn poison into nectar. When we stop separating and disowning all the dark places inside and let them sit with the radiant parts of our being profound transformation is possible. This non-dual embrace is alchemical.

How do you encourage others to surrender any rigidity, shyness or misconceptions surrounding the tantric tradition?

Tantra brings intelligence, refinement, awareness and meditation into sexuality. We could all benefit from that in a world that trivialises, commercialises and pornifies this intimate and essential aspect of our life.

Our rigidity and shyness can stay, they are forms of protection. When we actually engage with tantric practices and find safety and beauty in them these defenses melt in their own time. Regarding misconceptions though, here we need curiosity and an open mind to explore for ourselves.

What are a few of the benefits of this practice?

Renewed spontaneity and creativity. Deep healing. Greater self awareness, understanding and compassion. Deeper connection with lovers and a vast world of possibilites in sexual expression.

What can women look forward to at your upcoming retreat in Greece?

A beautiful, nurturing empowering and inspiring week. This retreat is a complete re-education of how we as women relate to ourselves, our bodies and sexuality. I worked as a healer long before I became a tantra teacher and this week has a special focus on healing and personal transformation, providing tools to integrate the teachings into your daily life.

In addition to tantra, how do you nurture your spiritual journey?

Commitment to kindness. Dancing, making delicious food, laughter and being part of a spiritual community based on the teachings of Jason Shulman. He is a Zen master and renowned Kabbalah mystic, my teacher of seven years and an illuminated, impeccable and at times infuriating guide to the path home.